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The Sacred Sacrifice - Chapter 5

CHAPTER 5 : The road of sacrifice This part delves into the poignant journey of Mata Gujri Ji and her young grandsons, Zorawar Singh (9 year...

Friday, July 26, 2013

Color of broken heart

You’re asking me
The color
Of
A broken heart?
I’d say
It’s still red
That is
Minus
The
Ebullience,
Vibrancy
And
Exuberance;
Dull
Dead red,
Like
Boring,
Drying
And
Caking
Bricks

In sun.

40 comments:

  1. Very apt description. I like the style you used.

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  2. I like it to, especially the 'minus' part!

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  3. Degrading the color to match the dullness of lost love is perfect.

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    1. Thank you so much Debbie for sharing such warm thoughts

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  4. Oooo, Ebullience, nicely done! I too loved the contrast of reds.

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    1. Thank you. I was wondering if it would come across.

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  5. I like how you distilled the red color to the washed-out color that most can relate to.

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    1. Thank you so much Janna. I really appreciate your support

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  6. love lost is a brick cake. perfect

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    1. I am glad the comparison works :) thank you so much

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  7. An original and well done work, Ruby. Not only is the brink leeching colour in the sun, it's hardening against feeling any more pain. Good use of the prompt and I'm glad you took it a step further too. :)))

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    1. Thank you so much Jo-Anne. It is so good to hear such refined and clear thoughts on what I wrote. I am really glad to hear from you.

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  8. That's a great observation Jo-Anne made above about the brick hardening against more pain. That's very true, and I think it's one of the things that makes your poem hit so hard, that and the deconstructing of red from its richest down to its flattest hue.

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    1. Thank you so much Kallan. I am really honored to hear such appreciation and encouragement.

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  9. Desiccated - that's how a broken heart can feel, when it's not pouring blood with pain. I loved this - we each have our own take on heartbreak.

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    1. Thank you Freya. It is good to hear your version and it fits in so well

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  10. This is so good. You captured a lot of feeling with this.

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  11. What an apt description. This is lovely work. Thank you for linking up. Please remember to return for the voting.

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    1. Thank you for giving me a platform and encouraging all through. I really cherish all my Trifecta associations.

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  12. That is some powerful imagery Ruby. I really liked this! :D

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  13. Thank you. This is simply the best thing to hear :)

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  14. Fabulous - From the opening question to the ending brick.

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    1. Thank you Kelly. Your words really mean a lot to me.

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  15. Lovely colorful words...and what will god build with those beautiful bricks of his?
    Hugs,
    Kelly

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    1. Thank you Kelly. I wish I could answer your question though. I guess it is like a contingency situation.

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  16. A flawless description of a broken heart healing. Very nice!

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  17. This is truly perfect. I read it twice because I wasn't quite ready to give it up yet. :) Wonderful piece!

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  18. broken heart perfectly described!

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  19. what a tragically lovely piece.. good job!

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  20. Oh, I can just picture that broken heart. You certainly have a writing talent and you're so kind to share it.

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    1. Thank you so much Sherry. I am really honored by your words.

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  21. Excellent post!!! I have learnt many things form here. I have also website where you can ivsit and pass your leasure time. In everyone’s life, at some time, our inner fire goes out. It is then burst into flame by an encounter with another human being. We should all be thankful for those people who rekindle the inner spirit. To get more information, visit here……………
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Since every thought is a seed, I am looking forward to a delicious harvest.